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<channel>
	<title>White People Are Funny</title>
	<link>http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com</link>
	<description>Just another WordPress weblog</description>
	<pubDate>Tue, 01 Jul 2008 15:15:13 +0000</pubDate>
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	<language>en</language>
			<item>
		<title>She didn&#8217;t look in the mirror first</title>
		<link>http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2008/07/01/she-didnt-look-in-the-mirror-first/</link>
		<comments>http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2008/07/01/she-didnt-look-in-the-mirror-first/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 01 Jul 2008 15:14:12 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[The South]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Wiggers]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2008/07/01/she-didnt-look-in-the-mirror-first/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[


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		<item>
		<title>Duane &#8216;Dog&#8217; Chapman</title>
		<link>http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2007/11/07/duane-dog-chapman/</link>
		<comments>http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2007/11/07/duane-dog-chapman/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 08 Nov 2007 00:15:15 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Stupid Media]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[TV]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Wiggers]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2007/11/07/duane-dog-chapman/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
So Dog is in the hot seat for saying some racist things.  We wont grill him on that because the media is doing a pretty good job already.  What we will talk about is how he acts and his appearance.  What the hell is up with it?  First of all Dog, you&#8217;re not Native American.  [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img src="http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/11/dog.jpg" /></p>
<p>So Dog is in the hot seat for saying some racist things.  We wont grill him on that because the media is doing a pretty good job already.  What we will talk about is how he acts and his appearance.  What the hell is up with it?  First of all Dog, you&#8217;re not Native American.  Even if you&#8217;re like 1/8th Native American you&#8217;re still not Native American.  Half of the country claims to be Native American when they are like 1/8th or less, but they don&#8217;t make themselves look like idiots because of it.</p>
<p>Have you ever noticed how his style of speaking changes depending on who he is around.  You can tell that from his show.  He becomes a complete wigger when he is around black people.  For that reason alone I don&#8217;t think he is a racist.  His son was pissed off, sold him out and thats about it.  Lots of people say the n-word.  I don&#8217;t use it because it just isn&#8217;t in my style of speaking.  Dog is just trying too hard to &#8220;be down.&#8221;</p>
<p>I think in the end people are going to let his racist slurs go.  If for any reason it would be becuase everyone knows that he acts like a wigger sometimes.</p>
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		<item>
		<title>James Vance &#038; Judas Priest</title>
		<link>http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2007/10/30/james-vance-judas-priest/</link>
		<comments>http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2007/10/30/james-vance-judas-priest/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 30 Oct 2007 16:20:47 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Music]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Religion]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2007/10/30/james-vance-judas-priest/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[How could we forget about James Vance, a suicide surviver who tried to blame his attempted suicide on subliminal messages in a Judas Priest song.

 
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>How could we forget about James Vance, a suicide surviver who tried to blame his attempted suicide on subliminal messages in a Judas Priest song.</p>
<p align="center">
<embed style="width:400px; height:326px;" id="VideoPlayback" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" src="http://video.google.com/googleplayer.swf?docId=-5636910946432086857&#038;hl=en" flashvars=""> </embed></p>
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		<item>
		<title>White Customers Suck</title>
		<link>http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2007/10/24/white-customers-suck/</link>
		<comments>http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2007/10/24/white-customers-suck/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 25 Oct 2007 02:08:59 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Psychobenzaprine</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Drugs]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[pharmacy life]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Whitey]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2007/10/24/white-customers-suck/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[

Not a day goes by that I don&#8217;t rue the cosmic clusterfuck that spawned the melanin-deficient amoeba that would go on to evolve into the white race. It&#8217;s almost as if some higher power were designing a video game and needed a generic &#8220;default&#8221; character that neither excelled nor underperformed in any major category. They&#8217;d [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/10/dumbwhite.bmp" title="Jethro at Home"></a><a href="http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/10/dumbwhite.bmp" title="Jethro at Home"><img src="http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/10/dumbwhite.bmp" alt="Wah dontcha go 'hedd an tack a phew moar re-phils ontuh muh Oxi-Codeen subskripshun! - Whaddya mean ya can't?!? - Whaddya mean it's uh-legal?!?!? - Lissen up, boyh! I needs mah Oxi-codeen, an if I hafta go tuh the 'mergincy room agin', yure gohn here furmah loyurr!" /></a></p>
<blockquote></blockquote>
<p>Not a day goes by that I don&#8217;t rue the cosmic clusterfuck that spawned the melanin-deficient amoeba that would go on to evolve into the white race. It&#8217;s almost as if some higher power were designing a video game and needed a generic &#8220;default&#8221; character that neither excelled nor underperformed in any major category. They&#8217;d already created the athletic Negro, the intelligent Asian and the self-propagating Mexican; all the major bases were covered! But no, they just <em>had</em> to have a humanoid equivalent of the blue car in F-Zero&#8230;</p>
<p>Now, unlike the other major races, Whitey is accustomed to getting what he wants, <em>when</em> he wants it. Thus, putting him in the role of &#8220;customer&#8221; is always a precarious move. Whitey doesn&#8217;t merely call up the pharmacy and request a refill, he <em>demands</em> it. Sometimes he even goes so far as to inform those filling the refill what time it <strong>will</strong> be ready, or else. Woe be unto the hapless technician stuck in the position of having to inform Whitey that he&#8217;s out of refills, the doctor has denied his request for refills, his medication can&#8217;t be refilled by law, etc. If there&#8217;s one thing Whitey excels at it&#8217;s committing self-serving slogans to memory; &#8220;the customer is always right&#8221; has now found its way into the healthcare field, and Whitey views the pharmacy as a glorified McDonald&#8217;s.</p>
<p>Despite poking fun at those wacky minorities with their accents, ebonics, &#8220;bix nood&#8221;, etc., Whitey is completely and utterly incapable of pronouncing the names of his medications. Now, generic drug names tend to be rather unwieldy to those not specifically trained in the health sciences. This is why drug companies spend time and money developing bold, easily-recalled <em>brand names</em> for their new products. (Viagra™, for example, was meant to subliminally envoke the image of Niagara Falls&#8230; ew.) But sooner or later, pretty much all drug patents expire and cheap generics rush in to fill the gap. Then I have to endure 79 year-old Jethro commanding me to refill his zolpidem tartrate at 7:30 in the morning: &#8220;Hey, durr boyh&#8230;. I needs me a REphil on my zol-&#8230;&#8230; zlop&#8230;.. sloppa&#8230;. zippid&#8230;.. solpaderm tah-&#8230; tih&#8230; titty&#8230;. turtl&#8230;. ah, fuckit! Mah Ambien™!&#8221;</p>
<p>Whitey has also managed to come up with gentrified ways of breaking the law. Now, if Rakeem wants some narcotics he&#8217;ll get them from the dealer down the street from da projexxx. Hector will break into, hotwire, steal, strip and sell an automobile (all using the same knife) for drug money. But Whitey just has to step it up to the next level. He has to try phoning in faux prescriptions for himself, altering legitimate ones, etc. He also can&#8217;t be seen re-using heroin needles like those dirty minorities; no, he has to have brand-spanking-new needles for each shoot-up! And since insulin needles are over-the-counter, he figures it&#8217;s a done deal&#8230;</p>
<p>Wrong. Most pharmacists figure out pretty damned quick how to distinguish between actual diabetics and drug-addled morons looking for a clean spike. For starters, real diabetics know what type of diabetes they have, as well as what kind of insulin they take. Hell, they usually have their insulin and diabetes medications on file <em>at that very pharmacy</em>! &#8220;Ah, well, see, I&#8217;m actually picking these up for my friend/mother/grandmother/uncle/cat/dog/cousin/neighbor/friend&#8217;s neighbor&#8217;s dog.&#8221; Right. This line is certain to set off the bullshit detector of pharmacists three blocks down the fucking street. I&#8217;ve actually received phone calls from nearby pharmacies: &#8220;That&#8217;s the third time tonight; wtf?&#8221; / &#8220;Yeah, we seem to have a real pandemic of hyperglycemic cats in this neighborhood, lol!&#8221;</p>
<p>Some Whiteys have even developed such an entitlement mentality that they will threaten legal action against pharmacy staff who refuse to sell them insulin needles. Fortunately, the law allows for pharmacies/pharmacists to refuse such sales on a per-case basis. (We can even refuse to fill legitimate prescriptions if the situation arises.) I cannot express in words how incredible it is to see the look on Whitey&#8217;s face when, perhaps for the first time in his life, someone tells him &#8220;No&#8221; and means it.</p>
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		<title>Westboro Baptist Church</title>
		<link>http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2007/10/18/westboro-baptist-church/</link>
		<comments>http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2007/10/18/westboro-baptist-church/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 18 Oct 2007 23:18:19 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Religion]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2007/10/18/westboro-baptist-church/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
There are a lot of whacked out religions out there, all claiming to be the only true path to god, but none are quite as crazy at the messed up folks at Westboro Baptist Church.  The church seems to work on only one formula.  Anytime anything bad happens, it was an act of [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: center"><img src="http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/10/fred-phelps.jpg" /></p>
<p>There are a lot of whacked out religions out there, all claiming to be the only true path to god, but none are quite as crazy at the messed up folks at Westboro Baptist Church.  The church seems to work on only one formula.  Anytime anything bad happens, it was an act of god.  God is punishing the USA for being a &#8220;fag-enabling&#8221; country.  Natural Disaster = God&#8217;s Fag Wrath.  Tragic Event = God&#8217;s Fag Wrath.  Death of someone against Westboro Baptist Church = God&#8217;s Fag Wrath.   You can always stop by their site after any of those events happen and you&#8217;ll see some posting about how its Go&#8217;d Wrath on the USA.</p>
<p>Still not sure who these people are?  They are the ones who like to picket funerals of dead solder, since of course anyone who dies in Iraq is because of god&#8217;s hatred for the USA.</p>
<p>They don&#8217;t seem to have much freedom in their lives, as you can tell from a documentary that was done on them which I have posted below.  The church is basically just Fred Phelp&#8217;s family, with only a few exceptions.  One of the funniest of the family is Shirley Phelps.  Shes a loud mouth, but its the things that she says that makes this women funny.  I can&#8217;t help but notice her mental archive of insulting phrases and snappy comebacks is VERY limited and she stopped archiving them in her brain around 1988.  She uses insulting phrases that nobody uses anyone.  Like BRAT.  Seriously, who uses that anymore?  Anyway, here are some funny white people:</p>
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		<item>
		<title>Chopper Girl</title>
		<link>http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2007/10/17/chopper-girl/</link>
		<comments>http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2007/10/17/chopper-girl/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 17 Oct 2007 12:23:38 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[The South]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Wiggers]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2007/10/17/chopper-girl/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[ 
Don&#8217;t worry everyone,.  Chopper Girl is &#8220;Still Buck.&#8221;  Not that we care or anything.  This video and song are both equally as horrible that you may find yourself rubbing your eyes, pinching yourself, and slamming your head down onto your keyboard.
Following the exact same formula as the rest of the dirty [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><!-- start insertion by YouTube Brackets, robertbuzink.nl --><div align="center"><span class="youtube"><object width="425" height="350" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" data="http://www.youtube.com/v/8wlWHtme7II"> <param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/8wlWHtme7II" /><param name="wmode" value="transparent" /></object></span></div><!-- end Youtube Brackets insertion --><br />
Don&#8217;t worry everyone,.  Chopper Girl is &#8220;Still Buck.&#8221;  Not that we care or anything.  This video and song are both equally as horrible that you may find yourself rubbing your eyes, pinching yourself, and slamming your head down onto your keyboard.</p>
<p>Following the exact same formula as the rest of the dirty south, Chopper Girl isn&#8217;t doing anything to save HipHop.  I don&#8217;t mind white hiphop artists, but flat out wiggers like this need to put the mic down, look in the mirror.  Poor Chopper Girl, as far as a I can tell, is the only white person in the entire video.  There are also a lot of female asses in the video, which would make me mildly question Chopper Girl&#8217;s sexuality if it wasn&#8217;t for the fact that its just following the South&#8217;s hiphop video formula.</p>
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		<item>
		<title>Bass Heads</title>
		<link>http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2007/10/15/bass-heads/</link>
		<comments>http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2007/10/15/bass-heads/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 15 Oct 2007 15:52:42 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Wiggers]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2007/10/15/bass-heads/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
We all know one of these types.  The 16 - 25 year old who thinks the amount of bass coming out of their car is equal to their popularity level.  Go to any small, predominately white, town in the USA and you&#8217;re bound to find some of these people.  They are usually [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: center"><img src="http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/10/bass-heads.jpg" /></p>
<p>We all know one of these types.  The 16 - 25 year old who thinks the amount of bass coming out of their car is equal to their popularity level.  Go to any small, predominately white, town in the USA and you&#8217;re bound to find some of these people.  They are usually <a href="http://www.roflwigger.com">wiggers</a> (god I love that word) and all they care about and talk about is &#8220;their system.&#8221;</p>
<p>Another funny thing these bass heads deal with on a constant basis is &#8220;their systems getting jacked.&#8221;  Pretty much all the equipment moves from person to person in their town as it gets stolen and sold constantly.</p>
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		<title>Immunization To Attend NASCAR</title>
		<link>http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2007/10/14/immunization-to-attend-nascar/</link>
		<comments>http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2007/10/14/immunization-to-attend-nascar/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 15 Oct 2007 00:18:48 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[NASCAR]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[The South]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2007/10/14/immunization-to-attend-nascar/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
&#8220;The Washington Times was first to report that congressional aides were advised to get vaccinations against several communicable diseases — including hepatitis, diphtheria, tetanus and influenza — before traveling on a fact-finding mission to the tracks.&#8221;Wouldn&#8217;t you know it?  This has got NASCAR fans, mostly in the south, pissed off at Washington.  Some [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: center"><img src="http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/10/nascarfans.jpg" /></p>
<p><em>&#8220;<span id="intelliTXT">The Washington Times was first to report that congressional aides were advised to get vaccinations against several communicable diseases — including hepatitis, diphtheria, tetanus and influenza — before traveling on a fact-finding mission to the tracks.&#8221;</span></em><span id="intelliTXT">Wouldn&#8217;t you know it?  This has got NASCAR fans, mostly in the south, pissed off at Washington.  Some are even calling it prejudices to the south.</span></p>
<p><span id="intelliTXT">You know how you could be in a room where something smells really bad, but you&#8217;ve been in the room too long to notice?  Thats what its like in the south, especially at NASCAR events.  I&#8217;ve heard stories of people actually sharing their teeth in order to eat at a race, but to each his own.  I just don&#8217;t understand how &#8220;left, left, left, left, crash, left, left, left&#8221; is entertaining, but whatever.</span></p>
<p><em><span id="intelliTXT"></span></em></p>
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		<title>Accidental?</title>
		<link>http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2007/10/14/accidental/</link>
		<comments>http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2007/10/14/accidental/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 14 Oct 2007 21:00:43 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Stupid Media]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.whitepeoplearefunny.com/2007/10/14/accidental/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[ 
I guess it was a slow news day in Reno.  This veteran does nothing but make a fool out of himself.  From the looks of it, nobody really explained to these Mexicans what they were doing wrong.  I didn&#8217;t even know this was illegal until I saw this video.  Now [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><!-- start insertion by YouTube Brackets, robertbuzink.nl --><div align="center"><span class="youtube"><object width="425" height="350" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" data="http://www.youtube.com/v/nONjlZ8YMkA"> <param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/nONjlZ8YMkA" /><param name="wmode" value="transparent" /></object></span></div><!-- end Youtube Brackets insertion --><br />
I guess it was a slow news day in Reno.  This veteran does nothing but make a fool out of himself.  From the looks of it, nobody really explained to these Mexicans what they were doing wrong.  I didn&#8217;t even know this was illegal until I saw this video.  Now that I think about it I know I&#8217;ve seen churches run the &#8220;Christian&#8221; flag above the USA flag in the past, but nobody wasn&#8217;t trying to give them a hard time about it.  Here is a message to white people:Think before you act.</p>
<p>If someone would have told these guys it was illegal I&#8217;m sure they would have had this flag down in a heartbeat.  The last thing they want to do is cause problems for themselves.</p>
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